A woman pregnant with twins seems to be a natural spectacle. And I get it; carrying more than one baby is kind of crazy and fascinating. Seriously, I feel that way on a daily basis. So you can imagine that people have said some pretty interesting things to me upon finding out I’ve got two babes growing inside. Here are the top five most ridiculous comments I have heard the past several months:
1. “Are They Natural?”
As opposed to what…fake? I know that people are just curious if I had fertility treatments to conceive twins, but still, it’s kind of an insulting way to phrase the question. Not to mention that it’s nobody’s business if we went through fertility treatments (which, for the record, we did. We conceived our twins on our fourth round of Clomid. But not IVF, like most would assume). However, just because I had fertility treatments and am now pregnant with twins, doesn’t mean my babies are fake!
2. “It’s Like ‘Buy One, Get One Free!’”
Hah! More like buy one, get another one even more expensive! Prepping for and parenting twins is not cheap. Here’s just short list of additional costs we’ve had to consider since finding out about our multiples: 2 car seats, 2 cribs, a minivan (one baby would have fit just fine with our seven-year-old in my Subaru Outback, but two babies needed the big gun, a Honda Odyssey), medical leave from work, and quite possibly the most insulting cost, double charges on every ultrasound appointment. And multiples require ultrasounds ALL THE TIME!
3. “You Must be Ready to Pop!
I started hearing this comment around 20 weeks, literally only halfway through being pregnant with twins. And gee, how lovely. I’m of the opinion that one should never comment on the “readiness to pop” of any pregnant woman, but it’s just adding insult to injury to hear that and still have half your pregnancy left! Mentally, physically, and emotionally, I’ve been ready to pop since then, but it doesn’t do me any favors to hear how big I am when I’m just going to get even bigger.
4. “Lucky! I’ve Always Wanted Twins!”
Again, this is said with such good intentions, but 90% of the time, when someone says this to a mom pregnant with twins, she just wants to yell, “NO! No you don’t.” Not because twins are bad. Far from it! I am blessed to be carrying these babies, but any mom pregnant with multiples knows how difficult and scary a these pregnancies can be. Increased symptoms like morning symptoms and pain, danger of Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome and/or Intrauterine Growth Restriction, the high likelihood of having to take medical leave early from work, incessant doctors appointments, premature delivery, and just the overwhelming exhaustion that accompanies carrying multiple babies. So when I laugh in your face when you tell me you’ve always wanted twins, don’t be offended. It’s just so much harder and scarier than anyone realizes.
5. “Good. Now You’re Done.”
Excuse me? Unless you’re my husband or my inner monologue, you don’t get any say on how many children I have. However, for some reason, when you’re pregnant with twins, people feel compelled to tell you that this is ENOUGH. You must be done. Especially because we have another child at home (yes, the twins make babies two and three). Which doesn’t even seem like a lot to me, honestly! Regardless, it’s our choice whether we stop here, pop out twenty more, settle somewhere in between, or even change our minds.