How to Look Like You’ve Got it All Together (Even When You Don’t)


We all know that mom. The one who always has it all together. The it-mom who makes us wish that maybe we’d tried a little harder. The woman that makes us wonder, how does she do it?! 

I rarely have it all together, so imagine my surprise when I was accused of being the it-mom twice in one week! First by another mom at the bus stop, and then again when I met a good friend for lunch. I had to stop and wonder what they saw that made them think I had anything in common with the it-mom. I put together a cheat sheet of six things that I’d been doing differently. {Several affiliate links are noted below.}


  1. Get a manicure

    Admittedly, whether you go to the salon or DIY it, this one takes some extra time. I usually do my nails after the kids go to bed. I did purchase an LED Curing Lamp last year so I could DIY a gel manicure, and I love it for two reasons. First, the gel manicure really lasts two weeks, which means I have to do may nails less frequently. Second, my nails dry in 30 seconds, so if I get interrupted mid manicure by one of my kids I can quickly dry my nails and avoid any smearing (and starting over).

  2. Do something with your hair

    Seriously, you don’t have to do much here. I have a whole Pinterest board devoted to easy hairstyles that can be completed in 30 seconds or less without a mirror. Some of them even work best when hair is dirty. Because, seriously, who has time to shower everyday? And if your hair is really dirty? Just throw in some dry shampoo.

  3. Switch to a tinted moisturizer

    My complexion isn’t pretty, so I hate to go out without makeup. But what mom has the time to put on makeup every morning? Not me! In September I switched to a tinted moisturizer and it works! It doesn’t give the flawless coverage that a foundation offers, but it’s so much better than just a regular moisturizer.

  4. Wear mascara and lip gloss

    Mascara and lipgloss only take a couple of extra seconds to apply, and they make you look so much better! I keep mine in the top drawer with my toothbrush and tinted moisturizer rather than with the rest of my makeup. That way, the things I use every day are easily accessible and my makeup bag only comes out a couple of times a week.

  5. Ditch the T-Shirt

    Jeans and a t-shirt is the go-to outfit for most moms I know. I get it, it’s quick and comfortable and you don’t have to worry if it gets dirty. Last summer my go-to shirt wasn’t a t-shirt, but a casual, comfortable blouse. It was just as comfortable as my t-shirts, but when I wore it I received so many compliments. It wasn’t too fancy for everyday wear and it wasn’t any more expensive than the t-shirts I had. So as I’ve added to my closet this year I’ve purchased more tunic style blouses and sweaters in lieu of t-shirts. I have to admit, it does look better.

  6. Smile and relax

    I really think this is the most important thing. Last year was a really challenging year for me. I had to learn to let go of the little things. To hope for the best and smile in the face of difficulty. One of my past employers used to say, “Fake it until you feel it,” and I guess that’s what I did last year. At first smiling and relaxing felt kind of fake in the face of all that was going on, but before long I really did feel more at peace. The smiles and relaxed persona started to feel like part of me. This year has been a lot better, so the smiles come so much more quickly. I’m not happy all the time, but I’m calm and relaxed. I think that, more than anything, has lead people to believe that, like the it-mom, I have it all together. Even when I don’t.

What’s your greatest it-mom tip?


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