Self-Care Secrets: Grounding rituals
Self-care is both a simple system of prioritizing yourself and yet a radical act of self-empowerment. Self-care often requires us to dismantle society’s messaging that as mothers we have to backburner ourselves in order to be “good” mothers.
It is literally the opposite. Embracing self-care actually makes us better moms.
When we backburner ourselves, when we forget self-care, we burn out. Maybe right away, maybe after years, Usually after your body and heart move from subtle communication (overwhelm, headaches, minor aches/pains, occasional injuries) to full-out screaming and kicking.
We simply don’t show up for others unless and until we show up for ourselves. Simple self-care decisions allow us to.
I know, I’ve been there.
Crushing fatigue, disconnection from my body and loved ones, severe injury (one of which put me in the hospital and stole 100% of my hearing in my left ear), PTSD, and more. But I was a “good” mother so it was “worth” it, right?
The Good News
I am happy to say that even though the act of prioritizing yourself as a mother is a radical one and requires you to advocate for yourself, even in the midst of internal and sometimes external objection, it is simple. Self-care is actually simple. Maybe not easy, but simple nonetheless.
Self-care doesn’t have to take money, it doesn’t even require huge time commitments. And the best part is that it gets easier. And I love sharing my simple secrets.
You don’t need to start off your radical self-care journey by taking spa days and weekends away without the kids. As amazing as those may be, they’re not radical, they won’t change your life. And THAT is what we’re going for.
No, I’m advocating for simple, small yet consistent self-care choices. Taking 5 minutes to yourself in the morning, embracing mom “time-outs”, turning on the screens to get yourself a break for you (NOT the dishes), lighting a candle, whatever feeds your soul.
I find that simple rituals bring small joys and they add up to connect my body, heart, soul, and the Earth. Rituals create rhythm to my days and weeks, anchoring me my routines. Small acts of prioritizing myself, simple yet radical.
Taking 2-10 self-care minutes throughout the day, for me, just me:
- Feeds my soul;
- Allows me to show up more fully for my children;
- Makes me more mindful;
- Makes me a more fully present mother; and
It also sets an example for my children. Extreme selflessness does not serve our children, it only teaches them that they also shouldn’t priorize themselves.
Embracing self-care actually makes us better moms.